Hot Mess

I'm pretty adventurous about food. I'll try most things once, and one reason I love to travel is because I like to try new food. I've eaten chocolate covered ants, kangaroo nachos, quail eggs, blue corn blue cheese grits, and some Pakistani food I can't even spell. I like (some) sushi and IMO buffalo or venison is the best meat for chili. One of my favorite desserts is apple cobbler with hatch chiles. I say all of this so that you'll know I'm not a food weenie.

Since I'm not a food weenie, one of my favorite places is our local gourmet grocery store, where I can buy eighteen different kinds of apple, spices come out of bins and I can get a tsp. or a pound, depending on what I'm cooking, and I can buy 700 different cheeses from who-knows-how-many countries (and animals. Oxen milk cheese, anyone? For $25/lb., it can be yours). This store frequently has "festivals," where they feature different types of food. One weekend it might be fresh seafood; a month later they're showcasing different marinades for meat. I have been looking forward to this weekend in particular because it was Eat the Heat - a chile festival, with lots of spicy stuff.

(An aside - if you're going to read this blog you need to get used to these because I'm a little bit ADD, especially when I'm telling stories - I'm from Texas, and I'm Getting Older. Both of those things mean that I tend to like spicy food more often than not. I find myself adding jalapenos to sandwiches, putting red pepper flakes on pasta, and looking for excuses to add wasabi to things.)

They had some great samples, and I bought a few things I sampled, like the jalapeno bread, or the Rattlesnake olive oil with chipotle. I looked faithfully for the little "Eat the Heat" signs, so that I could be introduced to new, spicy temptations.

Then I saw it, at the end of the aisle. In the freezer case. EAT THE HEAT ICE CREAM.

Let me make the disclaimer: I am a whore for ice cream. If it's frozen, I will eat it. Yogurt, gelato, sorbet, homemade, chunky, whipped, low carb, made from pig fat, whatever. So to combine ice cream and spicy...I was pretty excited. This particular flavor boasted sweet cream, chocolate chips and jalapenos. I've incorporated habanero powder into cookies and (as mentioned) chiles into cobbler, so this seemed like a fine idea to me. I even ate salad for supper so that I wouldn't spoil my dessert. As it turns out, I needn't have worried.

That ice cream was NASTY. Like, I only-had-a-small-dish-and-I-let-most-of-it-melt nasty. I tried eating around the jalapenos, picking out the chocolate chips, but it didn't really work. I think the problem is, the jalapenos were candied. If you're going to put spicy peppers in something sweet, don't dress them up and pretend they're candy. That makes me think of those refrigerators that masquerade as cabinetry. Don't be ashamed - it's a pepper! It's supposed to have a bite! But I am struggling towards a Goal, and I am not going to waste calories on some half-assed "gourmet goodie" that tastes like a good Mexican meal on the way back up.

Anyway. Tonight's agenda includes checking out the corn-flavored gelato in the upscale shopping district. I'll let you know how it turns out.